Far from the Tree: Parents, Children and the Search for Identity (Inglese) Copertina rigida – 13 nov 2012

Far From the Tree is a TOME. I mean, it's a great big, heavy book in every sense of the word. To be honest, I was a little intimidated when my copy arrived! I didn't read it cover to cover, but started with the autism chapter because it was relevant to our family. I found it to be a very well-researched, sensitive look at how autism can affect a parent's life, hopes, and perceptions.

That chapter was so good, I moved to the crime chapter and stayed up way too late because I could not put it down. Thank you, Mr. Solomon for pointing out the absurdities in our justice system when it comes to dealing with juvenile crime. (And as for the reviewer who questioned including crime at all, this book focuses on any possible way that a child can turn out different than their parents expected, and being guilty of a crime definitely seems appropriate to me.) I learned a lot from this chapter, and was particularly fascinated by the Klebolds' story. Once again, Soloman wrote with sensitivity about a very difficult and controversial topic.

From there I read the chapter on dwarfism, and then finally turned to the first pages of the book and started reading the beginning! I wanted to learn about how families deal with a diagnosis of autism; instead I learned about how families deal with all kinds of unexpected outcomes, how resilient parents can be when faced with hardships, and how connected are the identities of parents and their children. As a parent, I understand the constant struggle to balance who we want our children to be and who they actually are. "There is no such thing as reproduction" may be my new mantra.

One more thing: in 700 pages (okay, I admit, I didn't read the Acknowledgments) I never found an example of "martyrdom" that one reviewer complained about. The book relates honest responses from parents in the trenches. Parenting isn't always fun, even for parents of kids who have no extra challenges. But Far From the Tree isn't a chronicle of long-suffering devastated parents; there are plenty of positive, hopeful, make-the-best-of-it moments as well.

It's a fascinating book for anyone interested in parenting, psychology, or the history of disability. Highly recommended.

A book he was born to write. This is a 900 page book, 700 of which are reading pages, the rest notes and index.
It is a rational and helpful thesis and there is research quoted. But most of the book is based upon very thorough and careful interviews which lead you to wonder about the depths of the mystery of being human and of consciousness, and about the depths of compassion that "ordinary" people develop when they have an "extraordinary" challenge. Yoga teachers are often saying, "Open your heart." Well, this book does.

Andrew Solomon is an excellent writer. Even with medical and forensic research information being shared, he is very clear. It is not always easy to read, emotionally or intellectually. Lots of concentration is required BUT that said, it is like going to grad school for pleasure....the deep pleasure of learning and thinking because you want to.

Even if our own challenges from our "vertical" family are just the average ones, the ability to perceive and validate "horizontal" identity in others is an important insight we all can work with....even with 'temporary' ones like "teenager.'

Every physician, every educator should "have to" read it. May it become an undergraduate classic. May many many people read it now out of interest and in the interest of awareness, of their neighbors challenges. If we are more open to understanding in these ways, we won't have so much to fear (and shun). This book deserves all its awards but more importantly it deserves to be widely read, and for a long time. May it be translated into many languages, so we all have another shared language to explore answers to the fundamental an important questions extraordinary people bring to the lives of families and communities.

Thank you Mr. Solomon, for your good work.

Probably one of the most substantial and provocative books I have ever read! It's about people who have begotten "different" children and what those children are like. More importantly, it discusses at length what haveing those children does to the parents, sibs, economics, extended family and society in general. Slow read as I found myself haveing to put the book down and think about what I had just read. This author is always brilliant. Would strongly suggest his whole body of work.

How do we raise children who are profoundly different than we are?
This is the question posed by award-winning writer Andrew Solomon in "Far From The Tree." How do parents deal with raising a child who isn't what they expected him or her to be? What if the child is autistic? Deaf? Has Down Syndrome? And how much does nurture have to do with the people our children become? Or is it more due to nature?

Solomon began writing this book twelve years ago, after attending a protest of deaf students who opened his eyes to seeing people with `differences' as not having disabilities, but having their own unique gifts. He follows the lives of many families who are faced with the challenge of raising children who are profoundly different than they expected them to be. Each of these stories reveals in their own way the nature of humanity, the unconditional love of parents for their children, and the desire for all humans to be valued as individuals.

Solomon also shines a spotlight on his own upbringing. The gay son of heterosexual parents, who was also dyslexic and bullied for not conforming to the stereotypical expectations of what a typical male should be, Solomon reveals how he overcame his insecurities to not only accept himself, but to decide to become a father.